Woodstock Cyclocross Or: BFELD
This weekend I was reminded that doing things well isn’t always, or even often, as entertaining as doing them dramatically. I’ve ridden a couple of genuinely well-paced races this season, and I’ve ridden the rest in my favorite form that I like to call the “Burning Fireball of Exploding Lactate Death.” Yesterday I decided to leave the HRM at home and pace based on feeling alone which led, of course, to one of the best examples of BFELD I’ve experienced in recent memory. Allow me to share with you the joy of BFELD in chronological order.
-0:30 OMG OMG! FINALLY A GOOD STARTING POSITION!
0:30 OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! that was an awesome start! OMG! OMG! OMG! Is that Lou right over there?!?! OMG! OMG! Maybe today is the day! I’m like 10th!
1:30 OMG! OMG! OMG! I’m still in like 10th! This is it! This is gonna be my day! I’m in the Lead Group! OMG!
4:00 Okay okay, gotta let the Lead Group go, but they’re The Really Fast Guys. It’s cool! I’m like in 13th OMG!
5:00 Wow, my legs are full of stars! Just a few more minutes pegging it and then I’ll sit up and see where I am. Maybe all those starts yesterday weren’t such a good idea.
10:00 Phew okay, one lap down, and just a little more to make sure I am staying up here and then I’m sitting up.
12:00 Ugh, that hill got lots bigger. Ouch. It’s cool. Those dudes passing me are totally going to explode. I’ll work up to them in a bit.
15:00 Hey Mark! What the hell were you doing behind me? You’re never behind me after the first lap and a half. Oh no, wait…
20:00 Hey Patrick! Awesome! This is the first time I’ve been with a teammate mid-race all season! We’re gonna tear it up man! I thought I was getting cooked, but seriously I think I’m back. We’re gonna be like the Belgian cyclocross team. I’m gonna look over my shoulder and check the competition, let em know that we mean biz. Alright let’s hit it.
25:00 Holy crap, we’re catching those guys who just passed me! I think we might have even dropped Mark!
27:00 Okay okay, you just pull for a bit and I’ll sit in behind you.
30:00 Yeah, Patrick, you just go on. I’ll hang back here and block, man. It’s cool — all part of the plan. I’m just going to recover for a few seconds.
32:00 I think I’m going to throw up.
32:30 Is that Green Day those trumpet dudes are playing?! OMG that makes me so angry for some reason.
33:00 Ha, you think you’re a badass cause you ride an “evenly paced race” don’t you? Yeah, pass me. Fine.
34:00 Okay shit, I’ve BFELD’d. Now it’s time to rely on my skillz. Time to breathe deep and carve up the course super smooth style. Time to work these turns like…Hey where the hell did you come from?! No come back!
35:00 No more passing! Nobody else comes by me from now on!
36:00 Okay, NOW nobody else comes by!
37:00 Dude, did you hear me say that nobody else passes me? Huh?
40:00 IT’S 5 MORE MINUTES, NOBODY ELSE CAN PASS ME OKAY!?!
41:00 Oh, Mr. Pony Shop, you have picked the wrong moment to mess with me. NO PASSING!
44:30 NO PASSING! NO PASSING! NO PASSING! Ouch that damn poll hurt. NO PASSING! NO PASSING!
45:00 I’ll be over here on the ground waiting for my beer IV okay?
Been there done that. In the 40+ race I looked down, 1 1/2 laps in, and saw 196 on my heart rate monitor. Sweet, new max heart rate (by 3 BPM)! 10 seconds later total meltdown which took 30 minutes to recover from.
The upside is that bitterness was a powerful motivator for my next race.
Comment by patrick — November 23, 2009 @ 3:29 pm